One has entertained millions of Americans with blistering attacks on its politicians while the other hosted the Tonight Show...

It was nice talking to you, but now I need get back to my best friends, John Kerry, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama, for our dinner date. They are planning to slice up Israel and serve it to the Palestinians on a silver platter.

So I told Obama: "If you have to go eat dinner with your family now ,geih, gezunter heit!!"

Now take Yair Lapid -- Please!
ba-da-dum