Another enlightening (and perhaps sobering)post.I can wholly agree with your sentiments Rafi.Since my aliyah to RBSA I have been told:Which shul I should daven inWhere I should (and shouldn't) send my kidsWhich store I should boycottWhich tzedaka I should give to (and not give to)Which Rabbonim are "kosher"Where my wife should go to mikve (and where in the mikve)Which shechita is kosher and which isn'tAll of this has been through self appointed "askanim" as well as people in shul,etc.B''H I was given a mind of my own and don't need the misguided advice (and decrees) of the Immoral Minority.
"and where in the mikve"?
goodness - true, but I think it is true of most frum communities, at least in Israel. Even in the US, but on a much smaller level...LOZ - long story. In brief, there was a dispute of the chumra level of the mikva. To placate the more machmir rav, the local Rabbinate gave him authority over one pool in the local neighborhood mikva on shabbos. In that rooom hhe has his own mikva lady and he is the halachic authority, On shabbos only.So, during the week he tells people to go to a different neighborhood to use the mikva and not use the local one. And for shabbpos he tells people they are only allowed to use the pool under his authority, but not the other pool.
Rafi-I agree with you with two exceptions- tzedaka and mikve.While living in Chutz La'aretz I was never told that an organization dedicated to helping others on such a high level is "less worthy" than another (and I lived in a very Charedi community)and no one "passeled" the mikve in my neighborhood.